It was one of a series of adverts for East Midlands Electricity the Forest manager starred in during the 1980s.
'Looks like the after match debrief has begun without me', Cloughie says, as a load of kit from a women's footy team he has come home with is thrown downstairs.
It was one of a series of adverts for East Midlands Electricity the Forest manager starred in during the 1980s.
They’re football icons but just less lauded than others…
“I just wish I had players as loyal and as enthusiastic to their club as you are to Celtic”
Goals are the easiest way to sum up Jimmy McGrory. If he was playing, then Celtic had a chance of winning.
Of the 550 he scored (468 for Celtic) in 547 games, only one was from the penalty spot. He also scored 55 hat-tricks, while his strike against England for Scotland in front of 133,000 fans in 1933 is credited with the birth of the ‘Hampden Roar’.
But Celtic is where McGrory made his name and the sheer volume of headers he scored earned him nicknames like ‘The Human Torpedo’ and ‘Mermaid.’ Remember, this was an era where balls weighed as much as a bag of cement.
Born in Glasgow in 1904, McGrory had dreamed of partnering his idol Patsy Gallacher in Celtic colours and he did this and more in what was, in his words, the greatest moment of his career when he scored in the Scottish Cup final win in April 1925.
“I scored a lot of goals and beat a few records, but nothing ever compared with my feelings at that moment,” he later said. “And to play alongside Patsy Gallacher in a national cup final was a dream.”
He had a love affair with the trophy and won it five times as a player. League titles, though were a little harder to come by and the three he did secure were scattered between 1926 and 1937 - his final season as a player - as Rangers dominated.
Regardless, pulling on the green and white meant everything and was the main reason he rejected the vast riches Arsenal offered him in 1928.
Although he lived a comfortable life as a footballer, he didn't become a rich man as a result. At the start of his career in 1922, money was so tight that he’d meet his team-mate Hugh Hilley and walk the couple of miles to training at Celtic Park every morning.
“We could not afford the tram fares both ways and we were never exactly in the mood for walking home after our training sessions,” he wrote in his biography A Lifetime in Paradise, explaining it cost three pence to take two trams from ‘the Park’ to Glasgow Cross and from there back to his home in Garngad.
However, news of his talent quickly spread after becoming a first team regular. Arsenal's interest was no doubt piqued by his exploits against Dunfermline in January 1928 when the club ran riot in a 9-0 home win and McGrory scored eight times. By the end of the season he had 62 goals overall.
The Gunners, meanwhile, were on their way to becoming the best team in England, so the two seemed a perfect match. Except McGrory had no intention of leaving, even if Celtic were prepared to cash in on their prized asset and take Arsenal’s whopping £10,000 offer.
So keen were Celtic to conclude the transfer that the board and manager even led McGrory to London under false pretences so the Londoners could put their proposal to him.
McGrory was accompanying manager Willie Maley on his holiday to Lourdes, but the train would pass through the capital first where, on arrival, they were met by Highbury boss Herbert Chapman.
“He offered me everything but the moon,” McGrory wrote, and although immensely flattered by the compliments the manager bestowed on him the answer was still no.
He left for Lourdes, the place of miracles - the fact it would take one for Chapman to get his way was not lost on the striker - but the manager was willing to try again and intercepted the duo at the station once more, as they made their way home.
McGrory still couldn’t be persuaded.
“I just wish I had players as loyal and as enthusiastic to their club as you are to Celtic,” an exasperated Chapman said when he finally conceded defeat.
Not that McGrory was rewarded for his loyalty by Celtic's top brass. He later found out he wasn’t even the top earner at the club and while many of his team-mates were on £9-a-week, the most he ever took home was £8.
No doubt the board were angry at missing out on a massive windfall and the chance to buy some new plus fours. Still, “Jimmy McGrory of Arsenal would never have sounded as good as Jimmy McGrory of Celtic,” he insisted.
The goals didn't dry up, though, and his eagerness to find the net often brought with it considerable pain, as he discovered in the 1933 Scottish Cup final win against Motherwell when a collision with the goalie's knee knocked two of his teeth out. Luckily he was built for the physical demands of the game because he also hit the winner.
Even though the goals kept coming as he entered the final stages of his playing career - he managed 50 goals in 32 league games in the 1935/36 season - McGrory’s all-action approach did eventually bring his time as a player to an end.
An injury against Queen’s Park in October 1937 sidelined him for a couple of months, and during this period he left to take the manager’s job at Kilmarnock and when the War ended he was given the reins at his beloved Celtic.
Though he oversaw a 7-1 League Cup final win against Rangers in 1957 and won a league title in 1954, his spell as Celtic boss was largely unsuccessful in what was a difficult period for the club. He was, however, involved in a highly-publicised attempt to bring Alfredo Di Stefano to Celtic Park in 1964.
When he revealed he was leaving Real Madrid, McGrory travelled to Spain bringing defender John Cushley, a modern languages graduate, to act as interpreter. The trip proved fruitless and all they came back with was a tan as Di Stefano opted for Espanyol.
What a pairing that would have been because even in management McGrory never lost his ability in front of goal and this story from John Cairney’s A Scottish Football Hall of Fame is a good place to end:
“At a training session, McGrory, wearing his usual managerial bowler hat and puffing on his pipe as usual, stood watching a group of players dealing with high crosses. Suddenly, the players were startles to see the manager rush among them, hat in one hand, pipe in the other. As the ball came over he met it cleanly on his forehead and it bulleted into the back of the net. Calmly he replaced his hat and pipe, saying ‘That’s wit I mean, lads,’ and returned to his place on the touchline.”
Jimmy McGrory: 1904-1982
Clubs: Celtic 1922-1937
Clydebank (loan) 1923-1924
Scotland: Seven caps, six goals
READ MORE: Let's not forget about Gerry Hitchens - from Shropshire to San Siro
He only had one season at Chelsea, but it was memorable.
Weller signed for the FA Cup holders ahead of the 1970/71 campaign and ended it as top scorer with 14 goals, including this beauty in a 1-0 win against Newcastle, as well as victory in the 1971 Cup Winners Cup final.
He joined Leicester afterwards and spent most of the 1970s there.
Watch his FA Cup goal for Leicester against Luton here.
They're football icons, but just less lauded than others
“I wanted to see different places and play against different teams. A footballer’s life is short. My ability has taken me a long way from the pits at Highley. I want to see just how far it will take me.”
Not many British players have enjoyed the lifestyle of a footballer in Italy. They had been used to a freer existence and the ultra-disciplined existence was not their cup of tea. Or cappuccino.
But money talks and in the late 1950s and early 60s when footballers’ wages in Britain were capped, Serie A clubs had plenty to offer foreigners. Man City's Denis Law and Hibs' Joe Baker joined Torino, while Milan took Jimmy Greaves from Chelsea.
And in 1961 Inter supremo Angelo Moratti paid £80,000 for Aston Villa favourite Gerry Hitchens, a powerful striker who was born to score goals.
Across eight seasons in Italy he called the likes of Sandro Mazzola, Luis Suarez and Gigi Riva team-mates and didn't look out of place in their company. He also went by many nicknames, such as ‘il canone’ (the canon), ‘I’uomo di granite’ (hard man) and ‘un buon minatore’ (the good miner). The last one is a reference to his upbringing in the mining village of Highley, Shropshire where, at 15, he joined his brother and dad down the pits.
Kidderminster Harriers offered him a route out of that life in 1953 and by 1955, he was playing for First Division Cardiff, before Villa shelled out £22,500 for him two years later. It’s here where his career took off.
Having suffered relegation to Division Two in his second season, Hitchens helped Villa bounce back as champions where, during three games in November 1959, he scored 10 goals, including five in an 11-1 hammering of Charlton.
Back in the top tier for the 1960/61 campaign - his last with the club - Hitchens hit an incredible 42 goals in all competitions, with a hat-trick coming against city rivals Birmingham in a 6-2 rout.
Then it was off to Italy for the 26-year-old goal machine.
It required a special kind of temper to combat the crafty Serie A defenders, who did everything they could to put opponents off. Kicks, pushes and shirt pulls; if they could get away with it they did it.
Hitchens being the tough competitor he was, relished these physical battles and, looking at his goal record, didn't appear to have been affected too much. He gave as good as he got.
Jimmy Greaves, who lived in Milan at the same time as Hitchens, called him “a class act on and off the pitch”, also noting the influence Italy had on his pal when he arrived in Chile for the 1962 World Cup armed with 19 tailored Italian suits.
“There were also silk shirts and natty ties,” Greaves said, adding that he never got to wear any of them because the isolated location meant players were never out of training gear.
Hitchens didn’t have much of an England career, though. It was over as soon as his Italian escape began. Brian Glanville recalls travelling with him to see Alf Ramsey’s Ipswich play Milan in a European Cup game in 1962 at San Siro not long after it was confirmed Ramsey would be getting the England job.
A warm greeting from Hitchens was met with: “Oh yes, you’re playing in these parts.”
Charming, he thought, and that was it as far as his international career was concerned. In all he scored five times in seven England games, with his double against Italy in Rome in 1961 thought to have helped seal Inter's decision to sign him.
It can’t have been easy moving abroad. On top of the strict rules imposed on drinking and diet there was the ‘ritiro’ or the getaway where players are confined to a chosen hotel, often away from civilisation before a match and sometimes after if the result is bad enough.
There are no outside distractions, no wives, attendance was compulsory and players were even given a bed time. All focus, it is believed, is on football.
But while Greaves and others couldn’t stand it, Hitchens adapted, even if Inter manager Helenio Herrera’s ruthless ways made it difficult sometimes.
On one occasion when he fell behind in a team jog and with his team-mates back on the bus, Herrera ordered the driver to leave, forcing Hitchens to navigate the several miles home on his own.
Playing under Herrera was like being in the army, he said, but the man had experienced worse. “The discipline of the mines was far harder to endure than anything he suffered under Helenio Herrera,” Glanville wrote.
That’s the thing about Hitchens, it appeared very little fazed him. Fans loved that fighting spirit, and any anger he may have had was channelled into goals by the looks of it because he top scored for Inter with 16 in his first season.
Torino signed him in 1962 when Law and Baker decided they'd had enough of Italy and he spent three seasons in Turin, playing in two Coppa Italia finals and scoring 37 goals in 113 games.
Hitchens continued scoring for Atalanta and Cagliari after that, basking in the acclaim of supporters before going back to England in 1969 and playing for Worcester City then Merthyr Tydfil until 1971.
Sadly, he suffered a heart attack in 1983 while playing in a charity match in Wales and died at the age of 48.
He was taken too soon and while his was a short life, there’s no doubting it was an eventful one. Of the Brits in Italy, and there have been many, only John Charles at Juventus has arguably done better.
Gerry Hitchens: 1934-1983
Clubs (1953-1971): Kidderminster Harriers, Cardiff City, Aston Villa, Inter, Torino, Atalanta, Cagliari, Worcester City, Merthyr Tydfil
And with good reason. His mesmerising football and beautiful goals were a shining light in what was a pretty miserbale time for the Maine Road faithful, as Man City suffered relegation from the Premier League in 1996.
But through all this Kinkladze dazzled and still secured himself a permanent place in supporters' hearts before leaving at the end of the 1997/98 season when City were relegated to Division Two.
Rather than remind you with words, though, here's a video to highlight the little Georgian's genius (look out for Niall Quinn's Dumb and Dumber haircut).
Italian clubs enjoyed a period of dominance on the Continent in the late eighties and early nineties.
Serie A clubs weren't afraid to spend money to ensure their league had the game's biggest stars, with Roberto Baggio, Ronaldo and Zinedine Zidane all playing there at some stage.
But 1990 was a particularly good year, with Milan, Sampdoria and Juventus winning the three European trophies on offer.
European Cup final: 23 May, 1990
Milan beat Benfica 1-0 thanks to a Frank Rijkaard goal to claim back-to-back successes after their 4-0 thrashing of Steaua Bucharest.
They won it again in 1994, but lost to Ajax in the final the following the year.
UEFA Cup final: 2 May, 1990
Roberto Galia, Pierluigi Casiraghi and Luigi de Agostini helped Juventus beat Serie A rivals Fiorentina 3-1 in a two-legged final and add to La Viola fans' hatred of Juve.
Napoli had won the 1989 edition, while six other Italian clubs had won the UEFA Cup by 2000 where there were three other all-Italy finals.
European Cup Winners Cup final: 9 May, 1990
Sampdoria beat Anderlecht 2-0 thanks to extra-time goals from Gianluca Vialli.
Sampdoria actually prevented a clean sweep from Italian sides in 1989 when they were beaten in the same final by Barcelona.
This tournament was stopped in 1999 with Serie A side Lazio winning the last ever final, while Parma contested successive finals in 1993 and 1994, losing to Arsenal in the latter.
Jones, considered one of the world's best wingers during his time at Tottenham, didn't get off to the best start following his arrival from Swansea in 1958.
He was making his debut against Arsenal at Highbury, but wasn't allowed in when he arrived, having taken the bus there.
"I said 'but I'm playing today' and the [commisionaire] said 'yes, I've heard that one before, son' and left me standing there!"
Bill Nicholson, then assistant to Jimmy Anderson had to come out and get him, as you can see from Jones' tweet.
The game finished 4-4.
"If Hutchison is flashing his d*** again, that's out of order"
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